When I think of green citizenry, I think of people in immaculate houses with pristine solar panels who dust their pellet stoves with olive oil and a reusable cloth. Then I look around at my filthy, miserable apartment in crippling shame.
At some point during one of my shame spirals, I realized there were quite a few slobby ways that a person could go green and that you didn't have to own a "broom" to be eco-friendly. Here is a list of ten sloppy ways a person can go green.
1. Eat Over the Sink
If you hand wash dishes, then you may waste more water washing a cup than you drink from it. Save water by eating your sandwich, toaster waffle or chicken strips over the sink.
2. Drink Straight From the Package
This is basically the same deal as the last one. Recycle those milk bottles.
3. Bathe Less
Americans like to bathe a lot. We're bath crazy. Although you may not believe me, you don?t need to bathe everyday. A couple times a week is good enough to keep you healthy. (If you are very physically active or work in the sewers/morgue/infectious disease ward, you are probably an exception.)
4. If It's Yellow Let it Mellow
It takes about 3 gallons of water to flush a toilet. If you don't flush every time you pee, you'll save three gallons per pit stop.
5. Do Laundry Less
You can wear your clothes two or three times before you need to wash them. I wash my clothes when they start to itch. That's how I know they are ready.
6. Shave Less
Luckily for guys, the stubbly-loser look is in. Women, on the other hand, face an unfair social stigma for not shaving. If the guy isn't in to you cause you have some coarse leg hair, he probably wasn't marriage material anyways.
7. Don't Wear Make-Up
If you're a lady, I can understand the pressure to look nice. If you're going on a job interview, on a date or for a night out on the town, you should probably wear make-up as social custom tends to dictate. No one is saying ditch make-up all together. But if you're running to the post office, I think you can get through that transaction without make-up. As someone who frequents the post office, trust me when I say, "you will find little happiness or beauty at the post office."
8. Pee Outside
That's right. You can save three gallons of water by urinating on the earth we?re all trying to save.
9. Use a Handkerchief
You won't be wasting tissues, but you will be carrying a mucus-covered cloth in your pocket.
Perfumes, deodorants, aftershaves and colognes may contain harsh chemicals. They also have packaging waste. Letting yourself stink, as God and nature intended, can reduce chemicals and waste. If you see a decrease in friends, try an all-natural deodorant.